A Walk Down Diet Culture Memory Lane

One look at my very old Amazon wish list says a lot about who I used to be.

Nothing shows how far I’ve come more than looking through my old Amazon wish list. I was entrenched in diet culture.

I recently weeded through to eliminate some of the clutter that’s been on my list since 2010. Hello, phone case and charger for my classy Motorola flip phone. I don’t need you on there anymore. But I also discovered a lot of other things I don’t need anymore.

• Workout DVDs that help me work on “problem areas” and also come with a side of Jillian Michaels flavored torture and shame.

• Stretchy bands to tuck into my suitcase for travel, because who doesn’t need to risk snapping themselves in the eye with a gorilla-sized rubber band the night before going on stage to speak for an event.

• Books about eating for revving up metabolism, melting away body fat, and the magic of cabbage leaf concentrate or crushed unicorn hoof powder, or something like that. Intermittent fasting. Detoxification. Dr. Axe Diet. Dr. Oz Diet. The South Beached Whale Diet. Oh, wait. Not that one.

• I had cookbooks galore on the list. Keto Meals. Plant-Based Cooking. Carb-Free Snacking. Guilt-Free Eating. Taste-Free Eating.

Delete.

Delete.

Delete.

Photo by Adam Davis on Unsplash

I don’t need any of those anymore because I said goodbye to a lot of things in midlife.

• Counting calories like it’s a full-time job

• Counting steps

• A shame-filled pantry full of "low-cal" snacks

• “Last supper” mentality

• Tracking progress with friends on MyFitness Pal

• Labeling anything as a “cheat meal”

• The scale

• The phrase “junk food”

Food’s just food, not a moral dilemma. Surprisingly, I crave sugar and carbs less when I don’t restrict them. And exercise can be joyful movement when it feels right. But it isn’t a reason to shame myself into a sweaty 90-day shred routine designed somewhere in the pit of hell. Remember those?

So, it’s time. Farewell, wish list. I spent a lot of money on the items I bought. I’m glad I didn’t purchase the rest because none of the stuff really served me well. If there is any regret, now that I’m cresting midlife, it’s not giving myself that freedom a lot sooner.

Ready to Cut the Ties?

Do you feel it too? Do you wish you’d have cut some chains sooner and not beaten your body into submission with diets and fitness equipment?

I totally understand that feeling. But the beautiful thing is that you can be free now. It’s a process, and we all learn at our own pace. It isn’t too late to make the shift, and you didn’t fail by holding on to those things as long as you did.

Yes, it was terrifying for me to let go of that security blanket. Terrifying to wonder if the number on the scale had gone up. (I don’t even know because I tossed it.) Frightening to imagine a life without food restriction or tracking.

But now, looking back, I can see that diet and exercise weren’t a security blanket. They were smothering me.

Is it time to clean out your wish list too? What stuff do you no longer need on there?